Are Dog Owners Unhinged? The Great Debate of Dogs vs Cats (SPOILER: Cats are better)

I’m a cat person.

I will start by saying I understand reasons people like dogs – they give you attention if you are lonely, are capable of doing cute things, and serve as a warning beacon or protection force for your house. Yet, as I’ve gotten older my dislike for “man’s best friend” has only grown. I know cat allergies are more common than dog, so that keeps a lot of potential cat lovers from giving it a shot. However, those who can have cats still may select dogs for reasons I can’t understand. My aunt and uncle have always had dogs, my grandma and great-grandma always had two at a time, and for the past five years, my parents have had a dog along with our two cats.

Etnie Wackiness

Our dog, Etnie

Costleee

Aunt’s dog, Costleee

Xmas Eve (3)

Aunt’s dog, Nestleee

When I’d be home on break from work / school the dog would get on my nerves very quickly. Now that I’m living full-time at my grandma’s old house with my aunt and two dogs, my opinions have only strengthened. I mean this lovingly, but are dog owners unhinged?

My Reasoning

Barking and Growling

How does anybody find this pleasant? My parents little dog has a shrill little yipe and the dogs here at my aunt’s house have both a mid-range yipe and a deep bark. I hear these sounds constantly. People have told me it means the dogs aren’t trained well, but over my life I’ve been around 15 dogs in various homes and have yet to experience a truly silent and chill dog.

The reasons for barking are plentiful. Our dog at home barks nonstop when my parents leave the house… or when the garage door goes up to signal their return. If my parents go out on the porch or into any room with a door closed, the dog stands by the door and barks and howls incessantly. Yelling “No!” does nothing. Here is a video illustrating my point.

Our dog also has a weird condition where she stops on the second stair from the bottom or about midway down a staircase and barks a “ruff!” until somebody “invites” her with encouraging (i.e. high-pitched and stupid) voices. That gets irritating. Fast. Especially because she loves to do it when I’m asleep. She’ll wait until the morning when I’m sleeping in and sit outside my room either barking or sit on the stairs outside my room barking to be invited down. But only when I’m sleeping. Similarly, whereas our cats open doors, she can’t figure out how to walk in a door unless it is wide open. When the door has a dog-sized crack, she still sits and barks until you open it wider. That is sooo irritating!

Let’s not forget the classic! Every time somebody walks past the house, or another dog barks outside, the dog barks. When there are sudden sounds, the dog barks or growls. I understand that people think it protects the house or warns of intruders, but 99 percent of the time it’s wrong. Get an alarm system. 99 percent of the time they DON’T give off false positives and are not going to wake you up at 5am because a squirrel was in a tree.

Also, I understand I am very easily startled. I’m jumpy. I’m paranoid. My desk area is near the front door which means every time I’m sitting there at peace, or concentrated on a homework assignment, one of my aunt’s dogs barks right behind me and scares the bejeezus out of me. I don’t think that’s good for somebody’s heart. Perhaps my easily being startled is just as much a health reason to avoid dogs as somebody with cat allergies!

Cats don’t bark. As a matter of fact, they meow. Which is adorable. It’s not obnoxious and they don’t do it very long.

Licking

How can anybody not find this disgusting? Saliva from an animal that eats… well… I won’t even talk about the things they eat outside. Its not sanitary. People say cat tongues are gross too, but it’s rare for a cat to lick a human. And they are much more likely to respect your wishes for them to stop. Our little dog at home licks nonstop. The dogs at my aunt’s house are a bit more respectful with that, but they still do it. My dad likes being licked. Why, dear God, why?

Walks

Going for a walk is a great thing. It feels good and lets you get your head straight. So why do people want to take a DOG with them? Dogs have to be walked to stay in shape and take care of their stupid dog business. However, walking with dogs is so NOT relaxing. They stop to smell or eat EVERYTHING. Getting places takes time. Other people with dogs look at you as if you have some sort of special bond and brainwashed humans chitter about how CUUUUUTE your dogs are. Yeah, cute. The fact that they go for walks outside means they are dirtier too. I guess as somebody who is OCD-ish and doesn’t walk around barefoot unless they plan on getting inside and wiping my feet off would find this disgusting. Our dog at home eats the most repulsive things. And in a sort of related topic -

Bathroom Use

I don’t want to even mention this, but I have to. Dogs are disgusting. Why people want an animal that has such little dignity as to decide to pee every few blocks with you standing right beside it, I’ll never know! Cats sulk off into a litter box that can be placed somewhere out of sight. And you don’t know when they are using it. I don’t want to know when PEOPLE are using the bathroom and think it’s disgusting how open some people are with their habits, so why would I want to know every time my dog is going? And dog owners seem to love to talk about it too… which is just… asinine. And why would I want a dog to stop and visit their Mother Earth restroom with me standing there, while people awkwardly walk past?

I can assure you, if they are people like me (read: jerks) they are probably feeling high and mighty about their cats back home and REALLY happy that scooping a cat box is nothing like reaching down and cleaning up after your dog so you can carry their waste home in a bag for the rest of the walk. At least cats bury their waste in sand. They understand shame. Good for them.  Thankfully, my aunt does all the dirty work with the dogs. I find myself gagging.

Plus, let’s not forget that they need to be let out throughout the day. The dogs I’ve known like to get people up early to do that. If a dog can’t share the same sleep schedule as a person, that’s an issue.

Furthermore, our dog here got skunked earlier this week. It was traumatic for the dog and my aunt. It’s happened 4 times to the poor dog in the past year. Indoor cats don’t have that problem. If the animals here were lower-maintenance kitties, the house wouldn’t still smell like skunk.

EDIT: 8/11 – THE FREAKIN DOG JUST PEED ON ME IN THE CAR DESPITE HAVING GONE BEFORE LEAVING.

Smells

Not much to say – dogs just smell worse than cats. Not worse than skunks, though. In fairness.

“Companionship”

Okay, as somebody who suffers from chronic loneliness, dogs are too much. When I say I want a companion, I don’t mean somebody who sticks their nose in my face and breaths on me every time I have food, begging for me to share. I like personal space. I like being alone, sometimes. (Look for a blog in the future about my research on loneliness, because I think people like me get a bad rep as being needy when in reality, our needs aren’t understood.) Dogs are always there. Our dog at home follows you everywhere and tries to sit on your lap. I don’t want that. I don’t want an animal that sits on my bed where my feet should be and barks to wake me up. Cats will be cute and they’ll nuzzle you if you’re lucky, but most of the time they got better things to do. They wouldn’t exactly make a replacement for a future wife, but they’re certainly better than a dog :)

I’m sure there is more but those are some of my main points. As for people who complain cats tear up furniture, if they are babies and you have the front claws removed, as barbaric as that may be, the problem doesn’t exactly exist. I’ve also heard complaints cat pee smells. Well, if your cat is peeing in the wrong places, it’s sick or not trained. Don’t hold that against it. As for hair balls? Yeah, gross. Not as gross as what dogs do. End of story.


As for my weekly update -

Things are going well with the library education. I’m wrapping up week 5 of 6 for my first course and so far I have received 100 percent on the two graded assignments I’ve submitted. My job search has stalled, but I had an interview I was really happy with a week ago. We’ll see if that pans out. If not, I am prepared to keep my life moving onwards and upwards.

The author side is still stalled. My muse has been difficult to channel lately.

If you missed my “Bucket List” blog last week, check it out! Next week I will be talking about loneliness.

Categories: Serious | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

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One thought on “Are Dog Owners Unhinged? The Great Debate of Dogs vs Cats (SPOILER: Cats are better)

  1. Pingback: My Loneliness Is Killing Me (The Cold Truth) | Storybook Dreaming | Aspiring Librarian / Children's Author

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